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Friday, October 19, 2018

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Hahahahahahahahaha! Hahahahahahahahahahaha! Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Look at this way, Juice - Tom Scotto didn't lose a friend...Nevada State Prison gained a running back, and Yale Galanter made a nice buck. I wonder what Fred Goldman is having for breakfast this morning while you enjoy your powdered eggs and listen to the shackles jingle-jangle.

Here comes the verdict...it's up...IT'S GOOD!

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“I’d like a number nine combo with a diet Coke, no mayo.” That is the oblong-shaped fried chicken sandwich with fries (for those who don’t have the menu memorized). I became a secret fan while living in the anti-fast-food, anti-drive-through town of San Francisco. The corner of Ninth and Howard in SoMa supplied my Jetta with gas, a walk-up Starbuck’s for caffeine, and a blessed drive-through Burger King for those days where grease was a necessity. Homeless are ever present to relieve your center console of change as the aroma of processed meat fills the car. Before the first bite, a soft... Read More

Think you're paying too much for gas, rent, clothes and food? Well...you are.

But what makes this all the more painful is that this high price often includes a bad attitude. In a capitalistic society with endless choices and competition for your hard-earned money, unsavory customer service remains free and increasingly plentiful. Uncertain times seem to have no positive effect on this constant.

Therefore, as the dollar weakens, and buying power decreases, consumers need to become more savvy and selective about where they choose to spend a buck, or ten (two cups of coffee and... Read More

I am dating myself to say this, but I remember the sexual revolution. It was great and I miss it dearly. But open relationships, non-monogamy, swinging, and one-night stands are now little more than fond memories for those of us who lived through the wild 70’s.

For my generation, sexual liberation was a given part of the cultural and political zeitgeist. Today, sex is under wraps like no time since Ozzie and Harriet. Attitudes have changed (for the worse, if you ask me), but the sexual needs of men remain the same as ever.

What’s a horny young male to do? Enter the pickup artist... Read More

Yesterday I was eating some trail mix (that shit is delicious) and I was just walking around having the damndest time. As I was entertaining myself with different exciting combinations (two cranberries and an almond! A yogurt covered cranberry and one slightly salty raisin!) I got to thinking about how crazy trail mix really is. I mean, who in the hell decided that they wanted to cash in on a bag of some whack combination of small pieces of edibles that would never really exist anywhere on a trail? When are you going to see yogurt or chocolate covered anything in the woods? And raisins or... Read More

It seems that everyone wants to be looked at. Everyone gets that sickish anxious feeling that they need attention and validation from random people around them… this somehow makes us feel better than attention from someone we know… it gives us that relief that someone doesn’t need to know our personality to notice us. And yet… even though every single one of us (I don’t care who you are) feels the need for this, go to any mall and all you will see are people vying to get a glimpse of themselves in any vaguely reflective surface and refusing to look at anyone else. So who looks at you? And... Read More

Mannequin nipples. They’re freaking HUGE, right? The breasts themselves are small… hell, they are some seriously lacking boobs, but the nipples stick out like an inch or so. And everyone has to admit it… when you walk by (male or female) it catches your eye. When I see it, I’m like ‘ Okay, I get it, it’s supposed to be hot, it’s supposed to grab my attention in a very uncouth and unsubtle way that appeals to my baser senses and exposes my insecurities’. As I’m being visually and mentally assaulted by these titties, I can’t help but think of the impracticalities of the mannequin… the incredibly... Read More

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