I was sexually molested at the young age of seven. Every part of me knew that what was happening was wrong. In that moment, fear overtook me and at the same time, a calmness. I knew I would handle this and tell the right people. I knew he would have to pay for his actions. I also knew in that moment I had to endure what was hell for my own safety. But with that experience came a personal power that I carry around till this day. I remember being told how "brave I was." How "I saved other girls." How "strong I was." I remember internalizing those words but not really getting them. It... Read More
How do you get your child to understand that you always love and believe them, but sometimes questions are raised on validity of concerns because of past lies or because of psychological issues one might one dealing with?
~Problems in Parentville
Dear "Problems in Parentville"...
Eesh. Child issues. This might be outside my comfort zone as I have made the conscious choice to not have children for various reasons and one being the epic task of raising another life and the pressure to do a good job. I pay my highest respects to parents! I definitely welcome... Read More
As I woke up this morning in a hazy fog from my recent jaunt to Las Vegas for a friend’s birthday, my first thought, well besides, “Damn, I need some water,” was, “Oh, holy hell, I have a column to put out.” Which then, in turn, turned quickly to panic trying to decide the one thing I would like to share that I’ve learned along my journey. First thought that came to mind was: definitely don’t eat a buffet after you’ve done some drinking. Well, nobody needs to eat a buffet period, but that’s beside the point. Come on, focus, Shari. Simplify! So that’s what I’ve done. I decided I want to share... Read More
I need some advice. Please help. I have never been good with relationships. I actually have had just one. When it comes to guys it’s either all the way or nothing at all. No interest whatsoever. I really like this guy but I messed up and now he has the wrong impression of me. How do I tell him I want to get to know him and it’s not going to be a quickie?
~The Quickie Monster
Dear Quickie Monster,
First rule of thumb: You will never control what others think of you but you can control how you think about yourself.
Sounds to me like you’re the one... Read More
Today is YOUR day. Today is the day that you will forgive yourself for anything and everything you’ve ever been hard on yourself about. Today is the day that you let go of things that are holding you back. Today is the day that you decide nothing in the past has to determine your future. Today is the day you answer to that nagging feeling you’ve had at you your whole life. Today is the day you wake up to your life!
Stop right where you are. I know exactly what you’re doing. Those uncomfortable feelings just came up inside of you trying to give you reasons to not do this.... Read More
I am having problems coping with the end of a ten-year friendship. My friend’s morals and values shifted majorly starting two years ago; so much to the point that she was willing to give up her marriage and family for an underage boy. Yes, she did her time, and yes, I stood by her through it all…even when I did not feel comfortable doing so. However, now that she is “free,” she no longer communicates with me. Do you think I should continue calling/texting/emailing, in hopes of a response, or do I need to take the hint and start attempting to deal with the loss?... Read More
I remember seeing the wall. Actually, heading right for it at top speed and consciously making the decision to deal with the consequences afterwards. Why? Well, in that particular moment, it seemed easier to just go with well, what seemed easier; the short term. The getting of what I wanted when I wanted it. Of course in the long run it wasn’t easier. I was reckless. I was reckless with my own heart. Nobody else’s. Just mine. Which is the worst kind of reckless. If you don’t care about your own well-being, then you certainly aren’t truly caring about anyone else’s. You can fool yourself into... Read More
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just be perfect to yourself...be what you are and you will make a date...
Mary Mary quite contrary how does your 'essay garden' grow? With silver bells and cocked up dwells? Dwell on someone else's posts girl. Be a "whoa man,"stop flogging, but then you guys won't stop...so bring it on and we'll all be merry Mary. :>)
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