Saturday, February 23, 2019


by riginal (writer), moe australia, April 10, 2014

More bang for your buck? "Take over Joe here, we'll see you get a square deal rounded off to OUR nearest maximum profit!"


The Australian news channel spoutee spouts 'matter-of-factly,' "David Jones, (large shopping complex, haberdashery and lots of other clothing items a 'one- stop shop' almost) consortium has sold out to a South African country for 2.6 billion dollars."

They are going to improve service, ramp up internet sales, and generally play merry hell. Just like most take-overs which occur with monotonous regularity and enthused pon by the new CEOs.

We lost a major underwear chain some time back. Maybe the BOND chains were a tad heavy?

Serious, where does it all end? Is it take-over or taking away a country's roots/ tradition?

Tradition is a gagged nuance these days as money speaks louder than Trad muffins.'Tradition muffins' don't 'toast up' like pure unadulterated profit toasted by the bean counters at their profitability seminars and graphical projections on white boards with 'in the red' downhill ski profit ramp frowned upon. HEAVILY discouraged. And rightly so I guess in the take-over slippery slide to prop up the capital P juggernaut. Enormous amounts of ad money backed up by the leaping tiger of adhocracy ready to deviate at a clause/claws notice or scent of downturn margins.

I know I sound suspiciously suspicious but I wonder how many of the celebs who promote everything from coffee to "lose half your weight by swallowing the latest miniature 3000 revs 'internal blender blocker' that pre- blends your food internally, so you don't have to cough up hard- earned for an external blender. Our blender is the be all and end it does the work of your acid needed. Just swallow our blender along with the bullshit we supply free and if you're not happy return the unused portion of your stomach and we'll give you part of your intestine back! FREE!" Now I know I'm talking rubbish but the claims by some 'take-over' companies verge on the ridiculous blend too. One hardware mob recently plonked from the big A to Australia is not blending as well as it espouses in its ads but I guess the perfume of profit pervades until the bean counters say yeah or nay?

I guess when it's all sad and done loyalty and tradition become poor cousins to profit margin and as a result if and when things do hit the fan it usually splatters back on loyal workers (dare I use that term?) who generally become redundantly obsolete in the scheme of things sometimes. Do you ever see a CEO or bean counter with a C (Cos it weren't my fault!) or a bean counter (Bugger me!...didn't think that would happen but I was away that month!) come out the tunnel of angst with a stain on their suit of incompetence/responsibility-or such? Sport is another example. I guess though for their limited playing time career they have to go for the 'big bucks,' spruik a multi-power zionic jumpin' Jack flash LIFT "you'll get too! if you buy a can of CAN DO!"

The American show where pon the boss's work among, then suddenly realize that their worker's are LOYAL HONEST and golly UNDERPAID! is one good example of how business should be run. But I don't think the overall majority work that way? Or do they?

Will there ever come a day when you turn the tele on and the spouter spouts," America,in a very bold move, purchased Australia today... (handed a note)...just handed a note...Japan and China amalgamated today and purchased America and Australia. Business will continue as usual. No President or Prime Minister OR company CEO will lose their job." Never happen in a million years! Not until THEY retire for better or worse? Almost sounds like a marriage conspiracy of convenience...or a take-away? Naah...couldn't be,just my imagination running riot...right?

About the Writer

Bio...bioio...daylight come an i wanna go home. Come missa tele man tele me banana. A banana tele? Seriously would like to hook up with other comedy writers to engage.
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