Saturday, February 23, 2019

Are Your Past Relationships Affecting Your Future Ones?

Credit: finer
Time to move forward

It's perfectly healthy to remember, and learn from past relationships, unless your still burning that love candle in the dark.

No matter if you’ve dated only a few women or many, there will always be that one placing a permanent imprint upon your mind.

Perhaps she’s “the one that got away” or she left battle scars along your chest that you’re still healing from. Or maybe, in your mind, you’re still trying to make it work despite her continued rejection.

There could also be repeated mutual attempts at long-lasting love that never seem to work out, keeping you from seeing other prospective partnerships because neither one of you can really let go.

Whichever is the case, and for whatever reason, the years go by with nothing to show because you’re always comparing and holding others to an invisible standard.

And the danger of clinging to past memories of her is how it affects your ability to really find one who suits you best.

Sometimes she could be standing right next to you, even living next door, but you can’t see her because your mind is still reeling and focused on another.

Don’t get me wrong. There’s nothing bad about remembering past relationships, as long as you’re not obsessive about them or still burning that love candle in the dark.

We learn from those who enter and leave our lives.

It helps us realize what we like and don’t enjoy through past experiences. It makes us come to terms with what works while searching for and selecting a companion or partner.

But it can also confuse us if we’re holding on to tightly, especially if you’re comparing one face with another.

A healthy approach of benefiting from past relationships is simply to learn from them and move on.

It’s often difficult, especially if there was true love for her on your part, but my belief is everything happens for a reason and using the pain and pleasure of the past and applying it to your future in a beneficial way is always best.

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About the Writer

Randy Mitchell is a blogger on lifestyle, writing and relationship topics and is a published author of inspirational romance. His first novel "Sons In The Clouds" is available in paperback on Amazon. To read more about Randy, visit
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