Sunday, February 17, 2019

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Dr. Sludge here. I have worked tirelessly for many many tears formulating an anti wrinkle cream you can whip up in the bathroom using vitamin C. See i have developed an orange grove which grows oranges as big as the average human head.

Why? I hear you ask. Well, buy one of my oversize oranges,squeeze the juice out of it. Place half or the full outer skin on your face or over your head and you'll notice an immediate difference in your wrinkles.They'll disappear. Behind the orange. An option if you're a driver, is the cutouts for your eyes. Not... Read More


Once upon a nest, in the far off land of Antlanta just south of boredom, there lived a beautiful spoiled Queen ant.

The male worker ants lusted for her. Cursed the fact that they had to convoy gather in line to feed the boring townsfolk, namely themselves.

As in human nests there were those who tried to seduce the Queen with tit bits. Of course because like most beautiful females she wasn't going to proffer hers for the sake of a few grains of delectable eat, she turned her pretty feelers up, ignored even the offer of a winged honey bee fragment... Read More


Two am. Dream demons take up their prod, egged on by the lie and the subsequent transparent trimmings of the faltering relationship. She lay there amid the lame unspoken excuses for her being, and doing what she shouldn't have. Abstract thinking. Her breath reeked of hurt. She reached out. He sighed...shook, murmured something obscure...fitful dreamscape. She hoped he had included her, or was she excluded? Alone, out of bounds, she felt wretched, stifled a second outstretched movement. It could make things worse. Too late anyway...the romance was over. Who... Read More

IT'S THE MESS I AM. RIGINAL. Even the wedding didn't go off without a hitch. In fact the groom's nickname was 'Hitch.' His best mate groaned inwardly and outwardly as the expensive celebration got underway during which,Hitch, 'life of the wedding party,' any party, made his crazy speech. Inadvertently knocking over the bride and groom atop the overly tiered monster wedding cake during his hilarious speech. Waving his large over expressive hands around as usual. Always a hitch in whatever he did which didn't really suitNicole on occasion. The very pretty highly paid shapely CEO of 'Tech Solutions.'... Read More


Confused us say:"Plenty of fish in sea...but most miss boat and die after doing back flip when caught on hook of emotional baggage."

Confused us say:"Why pull on tangled heart strings when relationships can be formed with no strings attached just push button on knots"

Confused us say: "Woman who live in "never never" lamb end up mutton nothin' as punishment. Or conversely, mutterin' to herself..."never never" again?

Confused us say:"Better to take chance and twist 'live' key in search for an 'open' relationship than to settle for... Read More

The sand rejoiced as they haven't seen such a beauty so close, they clung on to her naked feet, to touch her gentle skin as if it was their long forgotten wish. She was beautiful and so was she kind as she let them touch her feet without any bother. She giggled and hummed some old song while a small silver double ring on one of her toe’s shined brighter than the silver moon up above. Look, look how is my new shoe, she asked me with a playful smile pointing to her feet dug into the sand making her own sand shoes. She started swinging back and forth, enjoying each moment and dragging her legs... Read More


He came slouching round the corner a few days later, did my mate. Laptop in hand gingerly, like he was holding a golden chalice. "What did Madam Butterfly say my besotted remnant of despairing slouch, with smelly sneakers?" "What do you think mate?...interpret." He shut the open chalice on my outstretched fingers. I let out an exaggerated wince. "Thanks for that."

I was trying to adjust the alternate 'butterflies' on the 351 carb without much success. My mate's a real good mechanic when his mind's in the right place. It... Read More

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Porn causes impotence? RIGINAL.

Watching porn is an outlet for sexual desire. Those who lack courage to venture into new avenues and those who are willing to do certain ugly things; however, in reality they are not willing to do things on account of social stigma, develops the habit...


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She loves me...she loves me knot. RIGINAL.

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