159 results for 'humor'
“Silence is a source of great strength.” ~Lao Tzu
It’s really hard to find silence. I thought it would be easy, but apparently I’m an idiot. I mean, silence is simply the absence of sound. Any fool can pick out a quiet place and connect with this source of great strength Lao Tzu is referring to, right? Not quite.
Noise seems to surround me at all times. Noise comes from my constantly-running information sources – radio, television, internet, social media – which I can barely pull myself away from. Noise springs from my mechanical appliances – buzzing refrigerator,... (more)
I picked up this book thinking it was going to be a mystery novel, a light entertaining whodunit that I could mindlessly read on a relaxing summer afternoon. What I got instead was a heavy philosophical treatise on Christian existentialism which delved deep into the question of existence, of what it means to “be.”
Have you ever read a philosophy book? It’s not ideal for a relaxing summer afternoon, unless your idea of relaxing involves slogging through dense confusingly worded arguments for and against obscure metaphysical concepts that hurt your brain to think about, exasperatedly... (more)
I want to be an important, famous person. I want to be a celebrity! I want everyone to know my name, and care about what I say, and follow my every move, and talk about me, and take my picture, and ask for my autograph. I want to see my own face on television and magazine covers. I want this more than anything in the world! The problem is that I don’t have any real talent. I’m not good at anything. How am I ever going to become famous and get people to pay attention to me when I have no abilities?
Today was the worst day of my life. This morning my mom burnt my waffles, and we were out of delicious maple syrup. Then I missed the bus and had to run all the way to school. When I got there a bully punched me in the belly and stole my lunch money. At lunch I had to sit there hungry, longing for those dry crispy waffles. At recess a bird flew by and pooped on my head. All the kids laughed and called me “poopy head,” and I had to go to the nurse to have her wash the poop out of my hair. In the afternoon I failed my African Animals spelling test because I thought... (more)
“Rarely do we find men who willingly engage in hard, solid thinking. There is an almost universal quest for easy answers and half-baked solutions. Nothing pains some people more than having to think.” ~Martin Luther King, Jr.
Preach on, Reverend King! I have so much respect for this man because he fought for what is right, and he dedicated and sacrificed his life in the pursuit of equality and justice for all. He is a true American hero. And he is absolutely right: I hate thinking!
Thinking takes mental effort, massive concentration, and modest creativity. (Just putting... (more)
...wrong. Neruda emerged from an obscure town in a disregarded corner of the planet to live a fascinating life that uplifted people all around the world. He tells his story masterfully, relating his own experiences and his perceptions of major world events with a poetic flair and a tinge of humor that delight and entertain the reader.
Pablo Neruda was the original Most Interesting Man in the World. Besides being a famous poet, he also held jobs as a consul in many cities throughout Asia, Europe, and Latin America, as well as a senator in Chile. He was in Spain during the... (more)
My teenage daughter is a rotten little bitch. She argues with me about everything, and she insists she’s always right. And she’s so mean to me. She tells me that she hates me, that she must’ve been adopted, that I can’t possibly be her real mom because she’s so smart and I’m so stupid. When she sees how much it hurts me, she goes further and begs me to take her to live with her real mom. I’m only trying to raise her properly, set appropriate boundaries and teach her how to be responsible. I don’t deserve this kind of abuse! How can I unbitchify my daughter?... (more)
“Laughter is the language of the soul.” ~Pablo Neruda
The second greatest way to bond with another person is to laugh together. (The greatest way, of course, is to get drunk together – which usually leads to laughter, anyway.) When we laugh together, our souls are recognizing a kindred spirit, communicating an unspoken shared understanding.
Laughter is pure, joyous, playful, spontaneous, and free – as the soul, at its best, should be. Laughter is an expression of the soul delighting in its existence.
As a tribute to the power of laughter, I wrote a poem dedicated... (more)
I need anger management help. Stupid little things set me off, and I blow my top like a mailbox packed with M-80s. When people make innocent mistakes or do ordinary things that I personally find annoying, I erupt in a chaotic firestorm of abusive language, nonsensical threats, and physical intimidation. For example, yesterday a colleague of mine was humming that horrible song “MMMBop” in my vicinity. Terrible as it is, it’s a catchy tune, and it got stuck in my head. I was PISSED! I aggressively whirled on the poor little woman and screamed in her face, “Shut... (more)
My family is driving me crazy. They all want me to get married, like immediately, and they won’t stop riding my ass about it. The pressure starts at the top, with my grandmother. She keeps telling me that when she was my age, she was already married with three children. Once she starts, my aunts (my mom has four sisters) all chime in. “Are you dating anyone special?” “When are going to settle down and start a family?” It’s gone from funny to uncomfortable to really annoying, and now I try to avoid family gatherings just to escape the harassment. But my mom is... (more)