548 results for 'riginal'
STEW OVER THE WORLD'S SHORTEST EYE CONTACT LOVE STORY. riginal.
THE SCENE: A butcher's shop in Instantcowbull. Sawdust strewn floor. Enter two meat workers. Morning coffee. Table with a simmering pot.Though shy the both had the hots for each other. Their chops were close. Their lips pursed. He trembled. She trembled. He touched her flank, she flexed her hindquarters, spare ribs sighed. It was inevitable. He rolled his cow eyes at her. She rolled her cow eyes at him. Their eyes met across the floor. They quivered in anticipation. Their eyes entwined in sawdust. He couldn't take his eyes... (more)
COME WELL TO THE LAND OF THO SULE MEDIA. riginal.
Hi kids. My name is Rule Bricktania. My distant cousin Thickasabrickalsotellinya Smith, in collusion with me, run a little country just north of Sara called Tho Sule Media Inc. We two started actually with a light bulb idea after starting to run out of ink.
OHH! Thorry! This place is actually north of da Sahara. See why i got this mixed up is because Sara my bestest text friend stuck her abnormally large finger lickin' good thumb on her mobile in a flurry of fly blown sweat and stuffed Sara in instead of the Sahara. Sara is actually... (more)
SHORT SHRIFT DEMENTIA. riginal.
Sat slumped. Head on chest. Halfhearted arthritic shaking remnant of a skilled surgeon's hand fused by scrambled cognitive. A random action, a dying reversal of fortune. Fortune earned now beside the point. Accolades from patients he saved through steady hands, somewhat gifted above the ordinary surgeon. God given surely? So he sat. The dribble down his chin unchecked.Visits from grateful people he saved, scant, almost none-existent. Had no family left to speak of...to speak to. You know, the book says, "don't patronize or overly fuss." Don't overload... (more)
Within two years the pundits of op say that they will be able to transplant heads so in advance i take my head off to all you writers who have been published (punished?) and more to the point advance, those who have or are actually making a quid out of it.
Man, the attention span among arty people fellow scribblers when you borrow a coffee off them these days is a 'pre book' event. Once you could sit back have a good gab and the listener's undivided attention; wandering when a honey walks past rarely and says "hello Mario how are you" swamping the coffee... (more)
DEVIL IN THE DERAIL. RIGINAL.
...kicked the Harley in the guts, no leathers, raucous, guy's nuts!
Crankcase leak, just a smidgin, raw cuss from the burnt exhaust...frights pigeons.
His mate's wonder,where to in such a rush?
Had imbibed on a bit, 'smoked' on a lip.
His missus just died on the drip.
Couldn't care less as he shot across crest
Howling at nearly full song.
Witness's swore the guy had slowed down,
The crossing lady lay... face down, on the ground.
Cops came along , onlookers throng,
Why had she rushed without... (more)
PET PLEA. RIGINAL.
My name's Eric,Eric Dribble. I run a mobile animal vet/pet shop...at least did til my main attraction, a horny anteater, ran away. They do that when they're horny. Bit like some guys with "ants in their pants."
You all know the type. Another conquest on the anthill of one 'upmanship' or to be more precise, another one woman up conquest.
Enough already, not my business but the ads promoting this type of behavior? Big business!
A wealthy friend came to me. She is drop dead or alive a woman gorgeous who could have any man she so desired. She has her... (more)
DIVORCE AND DIVVY TRANSACTIONS. RIGINAL.
If i don't get any comments on this post, and i won't get more than one, i would suggest, then as far as i'm concerned i'm going to divorce the lot of you. Has the internet become, or will it become or has it become, so sterile,so bloody impotent, that you have to answer questions such as an affirmation "are you a frigginistical' (collective noun aussie slang for more than one frig,a fruit that grows on trees in in Greece) robot! Are you a robot! Are you internet people inscribers bloody mad! Idiotic verbal?
Sure girls, i understand completely.... (more)
WHY WRITING IS HIT AND MYTH. RIGINAL.
Writing is hit and myth. If you myth you're not a hit. On the other side of the coin if you're very lucky, luck being the key word, once the mist lifts and the missus makes a cup of coffee; should you be lucky enough to be able to avail of same (cup that is) you can certainly aspire to a heady mixture of profanity silent so as not to wake the senses and the kids, to ruminate over what was written the night before which may or may not propel you to the upper echelon of print monetary perspire.
In other words through effort beyond pain you may... (more)
WHY CHARACTERIZATION 'OVERLOAD' IS NOT NEEDED. RIGINAL.
Students today's lesson delves into why you don't need ID description when writing, or indeed, preparing a novel for the masses.
My name is Prof. Ark. You may have read my best seller. 'Nondescript.' There are no 'character' vital paintwork brushed ensemble "scowl, lined, pock- marked coughing menagerie of wrinkled grey- streaked stained- despair...no torch of 'want' for the village cow. Non, pertaining to the Greek or Hebrew...meaning essentially from a synchrotic view...non. It is only when one aligns a variable tripod... (more)
PSYCHIC OR SICKIC? riginal.
Okay folks,i'm serious here. Who or whom is going to fess up re the affirmation they have been to a ridgy didgy dink di dyed in the psychic wool 'genuine' person of this mysterious ilk who has the intrinsic ability to tremble shake rattle and roll...not only your money- but a loved one's verbatim? I promise i won't laugh. Famous English "is there a Bill in the audience that hasn't been paid?" person, i believe in my spiritual foray of opinion, is a fake simply because he has the ability (an ability?) to talk so fast and furious he can drop/negate wrong 'vibes'... (more)