Monday, September 24, 2018

6 results for 'Limoge'

Top 10 Ways To Watch The Gene Simmons Sex Tape

By Limoge, published on Feb 23, 2008

1) Blindfolded.

2) Don't watch it.

3) Have a drinking game where everytime Simmons' partner looks away in disgust, toss back some tequila.4) I already watched Gene Simmons have sex in person when I walked into my grandparents' bedroom by mistake.5) That was Gene Simmons in that video?? I thought that was Regis in a bad wig!!!6) Have a barf bag handy.7) If I wanted to watch Gene Simmons have sex, I'd go to the monkey exhibit during mating season.8) No Number 8 --writer' can't believe Gene Simmons still has sex.9) Watch the Tommy Lee and Pam Anderson sex tape instead.10) Watch it... (more)

Tags: kiss, gene simmons

Heath Ledger's "dirty Laundry"

By Limoge, published on Jan 23, 2008

After watching the TV coverage of Heath Ledger's passing yesterday, I couldn't help but be reminded of Don Henley's song, "Dirty Laundry".For those of you who aren'tfamiliar with it, "Dirty Laundry" is Henley's commentary on the decline of journalismand how the people who cover the news are really just failed actors andnews coverage is all about finding the "dirtiest" story about someone andrunning with it whether it's true or not. (Henley wrote the song fifteen years ago.) The lyricsthat particularlycame to mind inlight of Ledger's passing are:

"Dirty little secrets, dirty little liesWe... (more)

Tags: journalism

What's A Doggie To Do?

By Limoge, published on Sep 19, 2007

Memo to: Hollywood Executives From: Murray the Schnauzer I’m writing to you Hollywood guys ‘cause I got a bone to pick with all of you . Now, I don’t mean to sound bitter but what’s a dog gotta do to get a decent job these days??! I did my research. Back in the day Rin Tin Tin was the go to guy. He starred in movies and TV shows and legend has it he could jump over 11 feet high and served in World War I (whadda show off!) Then there was Lassie. For like 40 years it was, “Lassie, help me I’m in a ditch” or “Lassie, save me I’m drowning”. The weird part... (more)

Tags: movie, hollywood

Child Stars to be Played by Dwarves Say Hwd. Execs.

By Limoge, published on Feb 18, 2007

To: All Young Hollywood Stars and Starlets From: Hollywood Producers, Agents and Executives In light of the recent meltdown of some of today’s must beloved child stars, (i.e, Lindsay Lohan, the Olsen Twins, Britney Shears (oops, Spears) we have banded together and decided that from this day forward all child stars will be portrayed by middle aged dwarves. We do this not as punishment, but on the contrary we are doing this to save America’s talented, and in some cases not so talented youth (sorry Corey Haim) from lives of debauchery and mental breakdowns. We believe that middle aged dwarves... (more)

Tags: paris hilton, new york, movie, hollywood, britney spears, lindsay lohan, sex

President Clinton and Global Warming

By Limoge, published on Feb 6, 2007

Last week a report on the "likelihood" that humans are to blame for global warming was released by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC). In their report it was found that humans are "likely" and "very likelyt" to be responsible for the Earth's increasingly warm temperatures. The authors defined the word "likely" as between 66 percent to 90 percent probable and the words "very likely" as 90 to 99 percent probable. Now after reading about all this verbal nitpicking, I was somehow reminded of the not too distant past when President Clinton was grilled on whether he had sexual... (more)

Tags: global warming, sex

I Want To Be A Hollywood Wife

By Limoge, published on Feb 3, 2007

By day, I am a somewhat mild-mannered executive assistant with lots of friends and a loving family. But at night I dream of a life a little more, shall we say, "glamorous". No, I don't want to be an actress, a model or even a rock star with male groupies who look like Russell Crowe (well, maybe). No, my dream is to be...a Hollywood Wife! Now, why you may ask, would a woman like me dream of giving up all I have for something so shallow, so pretentious, so frivolous? Well, all my life I've been absolutely fascinated with Hollywood. Everything from how movies get made to (yes, even the "dishy"... (more)

Tags: movie, hollywood

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