Wednesday, September 19, 2018

The Jaunting Jaunting Bear

by WinnerLoserBro (writer), brooklyn, January 28, 2010

Credit: I. P. Freely
this is thee actual jaunting bear right about to jaunt!!!

this is a story about a jaunting bear who jaunts and jaunts until he finds out the truth about his friends and his friend the pond.

There once was a jaunting bear who jaunted and jaunted about. He jaunted so
much that once it was said of him "that is one jaunting jaunting bear." Then
it was said of him "That is one jaunting jaunting jaunting bear." Even again
it was said of him "That is one jaunting jaunting jaunting jaunting jaunting
jaunting jaunting jaunting bear." Well the bear had been jaunting along
through a wintry forest one marvelous day and came upon a clearing where a
vast pond lay iced over and covered in snow. the only way he knew it was a
pond was that it talked and said "I am a pond." over and over again. He
attempted to engage it in conversation but it would only say "I am a pond."
He found this very queer indeed and attempted even more thoroughly to engage
it even more engagedly in dialogue yet the pond would only answer "I am a
"How are you?"
"I am a pond."
"Where's your mother?"
"I am a pond."
"Nice afternoon for jaunting!"
"I am a pond."
"Whatever is the matter with everyone?"
"I am a pond."
"Mincemeat pie really is delectable."
"I am a pond."
the bear soon tired of this dialogue and continued jaunting along. Soon he
ran into two bear hunters. Not bear hunting humans, but bear\hunters. They
were hunting humans even though they were vegetarians. Except they only ate
lice. That was the only meat. They said to the jaunting bear, "My you
certainly are a jaunting jaunting jaunting jaunting jaunting jaunting
jaunting bear." He said "that's besides the point-" They interrupted him to
say "Actually it's 'besiDE the point."(they spoke in unison) to which the
suddenly offended jaunting jaunting bear replied "Actually I am an educated
uneducated jaunting bear and I enjoy my colloquialisms." The talking in
unison bear\hunters replied "You don't even know how to use 'colloquialism'"
"I most certainly do." the jaunting bear replied.
"Not well." they re-replied.
Well they were at a stand still.
The jaunting bear decided to forgive them and said "Howz the hunting?"
the talking in unison bear\hunters wearing red plaid caps said "Not great."
And the jaunting jauntiing bear bid them adieu and continued on his jaunt.
Soon he arrived back at his house and the boring talking pond had followed
him home. Apparently it liked him and now it said "I am a pond." with very
meaningful tones of voice. it said "I am a pond." In a tone that desperately
lonelyistically was dying to be liked. then in a tone as if declaring itself
to be a great guy or gal of a pond. then as if to say to the jaunting bear,
"Is it okay if we hang out a little?" Well the jaunting bear was touched and
agreed to hang out with the suddenly not so boring pond and they went to
hang out in the forest and play ice skate between the upside down frozen
fish, reeds, and pond scum. As they were playing the bear\hunters that were
actually almost blind snuck up on them and shot the not so boring pond right
in the pond but luckily it was a pond so couldn't be hurt by talking in
unison plaid hunter cap nearly blind hunter\bears bullets. as soon as they
fired the jaunting bear jaunted angrily over to them and said "What in the
name of heck do you think you're doing? We're trying to skate between the
frozen scum! Haven't you a care in the world? What the heck is the matter
with you?" To which the talking in unison bears said "Oh my gosh and
goodness, we are truly sorry and will from here on in and this point on only
hunt nothing and stop hunting forever as we are vegetarians anyway and can
catch lice in our house". And then the not at all boring pond said "I am a
pond.", as if to sum it all up and show that they were all happy now and
they all skated gayly around the scum and frozen fish and lived happily ever

About the Writer

WinnerLoserBro is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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2 comments on The Jaunting Jaunting Bear

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By WinnerLoserBro on January 28, 2010 at 05:59 pm

coming soon....the sequel!!!!!!!

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By Don L. Nelson on January 28, 2010 at 11:39 pm

That Juanting Bear looks more like a "leave me alone so I can hibernate Bear" You should write short stories for kids, you have a great imagination and you are a good story teller.

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