Saturday, December 15, 2018

Are The Dodgers Ready For Barrywood?


It would be like Joe DiMaggio playing for the Red Sox. But, just think of how fun it would be!

Now that Manny Ramirez has screwed up in one of the worst ways imaginable--getting caught taking a substance banned by baseball--maybe the Dodgers should think about hiring their old nemesis and sticking him in left field. Juan Pierre is not a bad player and I'm not going to bash him here, but the team lacks power and Barry Bonds still has enough left in the tank (and in the syringe?) to provide some.

Actually, although I am very disappointed with Manny's Mishap, I have long said that MLB should just let players take whatever they want to enhance their performance. If an athlete is willing to risk his health, why not let him? Operatic singers looking to hit those high notes used to clip their you-know-what's many years ago, and Roman gladiators would do all kinds of strange things to their bodies to be stronger and faster, so why shouldn't baseball players do the same?

Let them take whatever they want. That way no one can cheat. Of course, it will change the game as we know it. Big, bulky hitters will be smacking 550-ft. HR blasts on a daily basis, and pitchers will be throwing fastballs at 120 mph, but who cares? It will be fun to watch, and those teams with the better pharmacists will be the most successful.

But, back to the subject of the Dodgers signing Barry Bonds. Just think of all the buzz it would create. It would piss off both Giants and Dodgers fans. Barry would embrace Hollywood and vice versa. It would be a great "forgive and forget" moment, a feel-good scenario unlike anything we've ever seen. And in the end, if Bonds can mean a few additional victories for the Big Blue, why not at least give it a try?

Think about it, Ned Colletti. I believe that L.A. is ready for Barrywood. At least until July 3rd, when Mannywood returns to the fold.

About the Writer

Ed Attanasio is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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