Friday, September 21, 2018


by DeeAnn Day (writer), , February 16, 2009

Defining yourself as "woman" is no easy task.

I’m a bitch.

Wait…no…It’s only because I’m a woman that I call myself a bitch.

Had I been born with external plumbing and the ability to urinate standing up without dousing the seat in liquid gold as my thighs cramp from the effort I might use different words to describe myself. Words like powerful, aggressive, and a real go-getter… a man that gets promoted while women who possess those same qualities are passed over. I might consider myself the kind of man that you want covering your back…a man that knows what he wants and knows how to get it. People might praise my propensity to call a spade a spade and to not confuse friendship with business.

As a man…I might be admired.

But alas…I am but a woman and for possessing these qualities I am labeled a bitch. Better yet…and possessing of no knowledge of how often I may or may not engage in sexual relations some might be label me a frigid bitch. And if you really want to get pejorative to both me and members of the gay community…you just might call me a lesbian.

To avoid such characterizations I may bend and contort. I may hide my drive and lay aside my dreams of success and autonomy. Of owning my own place in the world where no one, man or woman can tell me how I should or should not be living my life, because it is…after all…my life. I may curl my hair and blush my cheeks only to sit quietly with my legs crossed and eyes lowered. I will offer up no opinions of importance lest I offend anyone or be considered in the slightest measure displeasing to either the eye or the ear.

Perhaps I’ll forget that I have opinions, that I have a voice, that I have a say in the events which dictate the course of my life. Perhaps I’ll marry and make a home for my husband and subsequent children.

Perhaps I’ll be “woman”…

Perhaps I’ll simply cease to exist…

It is a quiet death this thing called being woman, though it need not be that way. Awake and alive I am woman as I define myself.

And don’t you dare call me a bitch.

About the Writer

DeeAnn Day is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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6 comments on Woman

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By john robertson on February 17, 2009 at 03:27 am

That was awesome.

Rock on.

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By Ellie M on February 17, 2009 at 12:55 pm

DeeAnn ~ WORD!  :)

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By DeeAnn Day on February 17, 2009 at 02:06 pm

There may be little in this world that is hotter than a man limber enough to chew on his own big toe.

Who is El G?

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By Jen on February 18, 2009 at 01:18 pm

This could easily be written from the perspective of a man as well.  I mean...are all men meant to be strong emotionless breadwinners.  Doubt it.  Societal norms put pressure on all of us.  I know I've felt it throughout my life.  No mom...I dont know if/when I'll get married or have kids and BTW how well did your marriage work out? HUH?  Pressure sucks.

El G would have loved this I bet and I would have loved seeing what he would have had to say.  God damn censorship.  Bring back the G!  Protest at the Federal Building!

P.S.  Hung like a grape?  I dont even know what that means.

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By Justin on March 08, 2009 at 11:42 pm

It always intrigues me that women and men have to same viewpoints, but as men we sometimes have to silence them to look so MASCULINE. Image is all it is, since the dawn of time men have took the initiative to rule things, and now finally the women are speaking up for themselves, as long as we don't go back to prohibition, this was awesome!

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By DeeAnn Day on March 10, 2009 at 08:24 pm

Baynurse-  Ah...OK.

Jen-  I don't know what hung like a grape means either.  Perhaps she is trying to tell us she has testicles?  And...if I were a man I suppose I would have written it from a man's perspective.  But Im I can't.  But yeah, Men are just as fucked as we are.

Justin-  Thanks for the comment.  Just wanted to point out that women have been speaking up since the 20's.  We're just getting increasingly vocal and decreasingly interested in accepting less out of life or remaining dependant simply because we can get pregnant and manufacture milk.

JT-  Don't lose that willingness to be "different" matter what anyone tries to tell you about how you "should be" cause in the end you can only be who you are and its really fucking tiring to try and be what other people expect you to be anyway :).  P.S- I hate folding laundry too, but I enjoy washing dishes.  Go figure...

And the reviewer that gave me three snaps-  Can I have those up and in a z-formation?

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