Tuesday, September 25, 2018

Tales Of A Nurse: A Formidable Life

by baynurse (writer), Novato, California, October 28, 2008

If the only prayer you ever said was Thank You, It would suffice.

I have helped thousands of strangers in 22 years of working in public health as a nurse.

I have provided comfort to young men and women with aids as they took their last breath of life in front of me.

Working in the homeless clinic in SF I have helped and advocated for addicts, the homeless, psychotic and suicidal patients. I have cared for criminals, murderers, rapist and child molesters working in the SF jails. I have had friends who are transgender, gay , straight, homeless, uneducated, and with various disabilities of different ethnicities, and many races .

I have been friends with the rich and the poor, the healthy and the sick, the popular and the unpopular,

I have been called everything from lard assed bitch to hottie.

I have stayed at the same hotel presidents and royalty stay with room service and valet and I have stayed at a crack ridden hotel in San Francisco.

I have done private duty registered nursing for the richest patients with more money than they can spend in this lifetime and have washed the macerated feet of the homeless and suctioned maggots from various body parts including the mouth of a comatose man dying of aids.

I have let go of houses, cars, friends, lovers, and family members, including my parents.

I have even let go of my stolen name and my stolen family.

I have let go of knowing who my ancestors are. I have let go of looking for my birth mother and siblings.

I have been homeless, in a mental hospital, living with strangers and those whom society has rejected.

I have given my last penny to someone who needed it . I have been without enough money for food, or gasoline, or for the medicine that I needed.

I have shown that there is hope for those who have lost hope, I have shown faith to those who are ready to lose faith.

I have made love to amazing , wonderful, beautiful lovers, and have been raped by a homeless man.

I have proposed on my knees asking for love and commitment and have been lied to and abandoned and rejected by lovers.

I have felt the depth of loneliness so deep, I begged for mercy and instead was given the gift of overcoming loneliness.

I have learned lessons in life by just doing what was in front of me.

I have mourned my own near death at the hands of those who once loved and praised me.

I have been wrongly accused of acts I never committed.  

I was repeated told I was ugly and unlovable, stupid, and worthless, I have even been called a wimp, ignorant, and a simpleton.  I have been called brilliant, genius, and amazing.

I was rejected by the church, the convent, my family, and most of society for my way of seeing things and living in my truth.

I have worked hard and long and done my best, sometimes without even a gracious thank you or an appreciation for what I gave.

I share this with you not for sympathy, as I am well, wonderful, and healed.

I share this so you know that I have been and done and seen a lot, more than most, and that I still have love to share, hope to believe in , faith to trust in, and gratitude to the Universe, and The Creator, and the souls who have helped me in this lifetime.

To all my Angels, and guides, in life and in spirit, thank you , thank you , please continue.

About the Writer

baynurse is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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2 comments on Tales Of A Nurse: A Formidable Life

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By Sharlene Hardin on October 28, 2008 at 09:22 pm

BayNurse, it takes courage to share the deep stuff and even greater courage to retain HOPE.  


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By Edward on November 05, 2008 at 07:18 pm

A great article.  Of course, there's one in every crowd and here there's two, El G and Joseph Mael who I  recommend to both to read Maybe Your Definition Of Constructive Differs From Mine.

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