Monday, July 16, 2018

Paris & Her Pooches: It's A Doggone Sham


Paris Hilton doesn't take care of her pets and people are finally calling her on it.

For years now, we’ve been hearing about what an animal lover Paris Hilton is. Now we’re finding out that it’s all a sham.

As reported on several web sites and in a handful of blogs, Hilton uses local dog rescue groups as her personal mutt exchange. She’ll adopt a dog, and then when she tires of it, she will return it like a Gucci handbag. Then, the other day, authorities from the ASPCA found one of her dogs hungry and neglected in a closet.

A few years ago, readers of two dog magazines selected  Hilton as the worst pet owner in show business, for treating animals like fashion accessories. Paris is always toting her frightened, little Chihuahua named Tinkerbell to parties and movie premieres. Every time I see the dog in photos, the poor thing looks terrified, and I can’t blame it. Chihuahuas are high strung and extremely nervous creatures as it is, so I’m sure the flashbulbs and screaming photographers can’t help.

I have one question. Does the dog ever urinate on her designer duds? I sure hope so. And another thing. What does Paris do with Tinkerbell once she goes into a party? Does she check him like a coat?  At one point, Hilton lost Tinkerbell, and then replaced him with a smaller, cuter Chihuahua, and then eventually replaced that one with a ferret . She’s even been seen parading around with an illegal kinkajou monkey-thing. Good thing she’s not a fan of Meerkat Manor, or she’d probably want to buy a couple of them.

Whatever happens, readers of The NY Dog and The Hollywood Dog magazines don't appreciate the way she takes care of her pets – and I can’t blame them.  Hilton loves the idea of being a pet lover, but when it comes time to step up and take care of the creatures, she treats the poor animals  like one of her many ex-boyfriends. Here today. Doggone tomorrow.

Paris should not be able to own pets unless she can be a responsible owner – just like the rest of us peons.  No wonder her grandfather wrote her out of the will.  She's clueless, mindless, heartless and talentless. And hopefully soon – she’ll be pet-less as well.

About the Writer

Ed Attanasio is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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2 comments on Paris & Her Pooches: It's A Doggone Sham

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By Glenn T on March 07, 2008 at 02:54 am

Perhaps we could use this to our advantage ... trying to convince Paris how cute she's look with a mongoose - and then see how that handles the paprazzi...

Man, I'm even starting to comment like El G...  Broowaha - making twisted bastards out of us all :)

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By Lila M. on March 07, 2008 at 04:37 pm

great article.  and I love the picture you if we already didn't know she liked d**k.....and alot of it, night vision (ahem!).

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