Friday, January 18, 2019

A Hairy Hollywood Situation

by KLiedle (writer), Los Angeles, January 11, 2008


This whole writer's strike business is getting hairy; really, really hairy. Now that Warner Brothers is rumored to be cutting up to 1,000 jobs and the Golden Globes have been reduced to a press con

This whole writer’s strike business is getting hairy…really, really hairy. Now that Warner Brothers is rumored to be cutting up to 1,000 jobs and the Golden Globes have been reduced to a press conference, I don’t know what to think.

Will the Oscars be next? What’s a fashion designer to do? Some days I wonder if it will ever end. For awhile (back in November,) I was thankful for my freedom, sans WGA membership. As an unaffiliated writer, I could write to my little heart’s content while supporting the WGA union writers and their cause.

“Hey, I’ve got no guild to tie me down,
To make me fret and make me frown…”

But, like Pinocchio, I was just lying-- fooling myself that this strike would eventually go away. And now, it’s only getting hairier…literally. This month’s New Yorker has an article entitled, “Strike Beards,” in which they propose, among other things, that this business of Conan O’Brien and David Letterman’s beard-growing is some symbol of solidarity for striking writers.

So yesterday, I had a hair-brained idea. Why don’t we all just grow our hair out?

The Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers can do their best to ignore the writers on the picket lines, the little guys losing their jobs, the awards show telecasts that are falling away like dominoes, and the strength of writers' words in all of this, but they cannot possibly ignore our hair. It’ll just keep growing and growing, like the list of casualties from this strike, now a war of pure stubbornness.

The dealmaker in my fantasy world of ending this god-awful strike? Writers and supporters alike would continually grow out their hair, chop it off, send it to the studios gates and picket locations, and start all over again.

So that’s it. That’s my hair-brained idea that's so simple and so crazy, it just might work. Send the studios hair-- Bushels and barrels and mountains of hair. Let's get all Grimm's Fairytales on them.

The Strikers could even wrangle those Teamsters into making hairy, daily shipments. (I’m sure they’d also donate some protein-rich locks for the ever-growing pile, too.)

Sure, beards are a good start, but me? I’m a girl, but I come from hearty German and Russian stock and my hair grows faster than weeds after a rain. So, beware.

At this point, and I don’t think I’m alone here, I’m willing to go to all "lengths" to get the entertainment industry back on its feet. Let the AMPTP finally give in and give the writers something workable and something fair so we can all leave this abysmal reality world and get back to the fantasy world we all love creating.

As a Writers Guild spokesman said in the above-referenced The New Yorker article:

"As long as it calls attention to the issues at stake and gets the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers back to the bargaining table...we're all for it."

*Illustration By: Panshi Panshi/flickr. Artist profile available on

About the Writer

KLiedle is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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3 comments on A Hairy Hollywood Situation

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By Kerry on January 11, 2008 at 02:33 pm

What a wonderful hair-brained idea!

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By Jen on January 11, 2008 at 02:48 pm

I seriously wonder how long this can go on.  How long can people...and by that I mean "everybody else responsible for getting a picture made" remain here un-employed and unable to pay the rent.  One friend of mine has been out of work since October.  OCTOBER!!!!

Greed is an ugly ugly thing.

Great article!

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By Jen on January 11, 2008 at 03:42 pm

My sympathy does not lie with the writers or the AMPTP.  Greedy bastards IMHO.  My sympathy lies with all those affected by this stalemate.

One nice thing that might come out of this...and Im stealing this idea from my that it just might chase some of the newbies out of town and clear up traffic a bit.

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