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Tuesday, October 17, 2017

Report Suspicious Activity

by AM Nelson (writer), Los Angeles, October 29, 2006

Mysteriously floating in the windless sky, an ostentation of water fowl lament the evening’s activity. Late last night from the roof of the Cadillac Hotel, in Venice Beach, gruesome events were sighted. The generally good-natured and entertaining spare-changers of the boardwalk, took on an aggressive, unearthly quality, as they began to bite and tear apart costumed party-goers.

“That crunch and munch sound filled the air long after the screams had died away,” cashier of Henry’s Beach Market, Ted Billows states. His hand shakes slightly as he attempts to add more sugar to an overflowing Styrofoam cup. “The one they call Bear, I watched him gnaw on a bumble bee, a witch, a saloon-girl, and a teacup poodle dressed as Paris Hilton. He defiantly was out for the ladies. I imagine he scored bigger than he has in years. He ought to consider beard-grooming.”

Through tear-filled eyes, Madeline Reiker, roof-top party witness, accounts details. “A woman and boy cornered a couple dressed as Adam and Eve under that restaurant’s patio,” she pointed across the street. “The tables had been stacked, and it created a human trap. I wanted to yell, ‘climb! climb!,’ but was afraid it might give away my own location. It was awful. I keep seeing her apple flying into the air and hearing his calls to God.”

Local residents did not express concern this morning upon hearing the neighborhood gossip, or even witnessing the busyness of police investigation. “Ah, they come, they go. Venice attracts nuts every once in awhile, but they figure out how to fit in eventually. This is just a phase,” an unidentified resident states. Other residents claimed the spare-changers were harmless and insisted tonight’s activity would be nothing but guitar Elvis impersonations; again.

Fourteen missing person reports have already been filed with local authorities. LAPD is suggesting a curfew of 7pm on the Venice Boardwalk, and surrounding areas, for the next three evenings. “Until we know what’s happening, it’s hard to say. Body recovery has begun and evidence of bloody attacks is present. We are warning citizens to be extra careful this Halloween season, and to immediately report any suspicious activity; such as biting, eating, scratching, or general dismemberment,” states Officer Jose Withers.


About the Writer

AM Nelson is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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