Friday, October 19, 2018

It's That Time Of The Year

by Steven Blake (writer), Winnetka, December 09, 2007

**I did not write this note and to my knowledge the author is unknown, but I felt it was good humor needing to be shared. I think there is a moral behind this note too. Hmmmm...let me know.**

For My Democrat Friends:

"Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, withrespect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. And without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee. By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher.

This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher."

For My Republican Friends:

Here's wishing all of You a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year

For others: Dating Advice for the Upcoming Year

About the Writer

Steven Blake is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
Want to write articles too? Sign up & become a writer!

7 comments on It's That Time Of The Year

Log In To Vote   Score: -1
By Steven Blake on December 10, 2007 at 04:09 am
obviously it offended someone. HAHAHA
 Report abuse

Log In To Vote   Score: 5
By Ivan Homeless on December 11, 2007 at 05:53 pm
And yet, the banner ad on your article says "God Still Loves Us" - I love irony...
 Report abuse

Log In To Vote   Score: 5
By 'Mean' Mike Duffau on December 12, 2007 at 01:52 am
well said champ!
 Report abuse

Log In To Vote   Score: -1
By Steven Blake on December 22, 2007 at 12:42 pm
Well Mike some people were offended and didn't just see the humor in it, they just marked ones with three different accounts in the last day
 Report abuse

Log In To Vote   Score: 4
By Sharlene Hardin on December 23, 2007 at 10:31 am
Hey, I thought it was funny last year and still just as funny this year (and appreciate you posting it)!
 Report abuse

Log In To Vote   Score: 2
By Lois on January 03, 2008 at 05:42 pm
A very funny cut & paste post.
 Report abuse

Log In To Vote   Score: 1
By Cindy on January 11, 2008 at 04:14 pm

I'm a Dem but this one had me laughing.  Come on, we're not that picky - are we?  How come my GOP friends missed this one before?  I shared it with them and they just loved it.

 Report abuse

Add A Comment!

Click here to signup or login.

Rate This Article

Your vote matters to us