(Pexels)

You may have heard the term “malignant divorce” before, but never thought that you’d find yourself going through one! If you weren’t aware, a malignant divorce happens when one party simply wants to walk away with everything, and the other wants to mediate, negotiate, and work towards a solution. When the more “malignant” party regresses enough, it can bring out certain personality types in people. Here are some of the most common ones in a hostile divorce.

First of all, we have “the victim”. This one doesn’t need that much explaining. This personality type is characterized by a certainty that they’re having some kind of injustice done to them. They often believe that you shouldn’t have anything to do with the children due to what you’ve done in the past. Sometimes, this attitude is totally justified. On many occasions though, you get “victims” who look for any opportunity to make their situation sound more dire than it was, and even lie about your past relationship. This has driven many innocent men into finding a domestic violence attorney to avoid prison!

(Pixabay)

Next up, we have a control freak. In some ways, these can be considered the opposite to the “victim”, in that they’re usually male rather than female. People who are very controlling in the course of a marriage will often become even worse after a regression. The control freak is generally extremely anxious about how the proceedings will end up, but tries to cover this up by planning out everything in meticulous detail. He or she may take steps to set you up, and then bring evidence of your implied “incompetence” to court. The crux of their strategy is to prove how capable of everything they are and how incompetent you are.

Closely related to the last two categories, you also have to be aware of narcissists. Again, the clue’s in the name here. Narcissists are utterly self-serving and self-centered. Their selfish personalities are often at the heart of why the divorce happened in the first place, and more severe tendencies can come up now that there’s more pressure on them. After the divorce, it’s all about them, and how they can come out of this situation on top. They’ll be almost unmovable if you can get them to even come to a mediation session, and will suddenly seem to forget your years of devotion and support.

Finally, there’s an extension of the narcissist, victim and control freak. I’ll call them “The Avenger”. These people, like you, will have some selfish interest in the divorce. However, you’ll quickly find that they’re more interested in you losing than themselves winning. These people can spend a small fortune in legal fees and digging up dirt on you, and won’t be satisfied until they know you’re hurting. They’ll go out of their way just to put an obstacle between you and the shared property you want, and be extremely stubborn in any negotiations.

Hopefully, you’ll never have to use this post. If you find yourself in a malignant divorce though, it’s important to know what you’re dealing with.