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Thursday, December 14, 2017

A Co-workers Nightmare

by 'Mean' Mike Duffau (writer), I'm the boss!, October 31, 2007

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In the typical world of the 9 to 5 job where working for 'The Man' is stressful enough. You're always trying to find a way to beat the system or defy the rules by being the rebel among your staff. Someone who others can look up to knowing that you've stood up to 'The Man'.

What if your problem is not...with 'The Man'?(In most cases it does) But this is special and more challenging. Why? Because, not only is 'The Man' an individual that you despise but he/she seems to counter by hiring a nemesis to the working staff. This is called the co-worker nightmare.

"Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce a new addition to the team... Romeo Mitra".

This is a memoir of the worse co-worker in the history of the 9 to 5 world:

I remember the day when Romeo Mitra drove up in his silver Honda Civic with his glass pact exaust system as if he just came from the set of 'The Fast and the Furious'. Wearing a tee shirt/jeans/sneakers, and a large tattoo. He walks as though he's the asian Marlon Brando. Clearly not a way to come in for a job interview. In the back of my mind I know he's not going to get the job. I'm not going to disclose what type of job this is for the sake of reputation but it applies to all dead-end employment.
I was dumb founded when Romeo Mitra got the job! "What kind of herb is 'The Man' smoking nowadays?" I needed a puff...maybe a few puffs for the stress that I was about to inherit.
The rule is...everybody is cool at the beginning and that's the way it was with Romeo Mitra.

Romeo Mitra, born and raised in the jungles of the Philippines. Came to the United States in 1998 with no proper form of education and speaks with a heavy broken accent. He seems to have interest in sports cars which he thinks his Honda Civic is a fancy luxury. The other is his frequent trips to McDonalds and his stomach can vouch for that. This is a brief summery of L.A.'s worst co-worker.

I can read people pretty good without even talking to them. I knew from the start that he was going to be worthless and my quest to prove it would take time and patience. Most of all, this was going to take strategy. It's like a game of Risk when you plan your next hit.

After the first week, the signs were showing that Romeo Mitra was slipping. I was the first to let the other guys know that he's a piece of sh*t! They just shrugged their shoulders and paid little attention until they got a piece of... Romeo Mitra. This job involves team effort and if one is not up to par the others feel the pressure and have to work double to pick up the slack. This is where friction is born and it'll only get worse if Romeo Mitra doesn't shape up. In fact, it has already escalated to a full bloom tention war when he reports to work in just a few short months.
He tends to disappear at the most crucial moments when we're busy. Even when it's slow he takes several mystery breaks. When he goes on his thirty minute lunch break he speeds off in his Honda to the nearest McDonalds without punching out. He takes about fifteen minutes or so, comes back, then punches out for his official lunch break and has a burger feast. So that's an easy 45-55 minute meal. We have tried to brief him that's it's not fair for the rest of the staff. He's going to do what he wants regardless of what we tell him. I, personally have tried dealing with him and he nods his head that he understands, but it's in one ear and out the other. "I gave up on him a long time ago. Romeo Mitra must go!"
He is not socially capable of holding a conversation with my group of friends. He's ignored by us at all times! The only sub-human that pays any attention to him is his own kind, and there's a hand full of them around. The only time we do communicate is when it involves the work and we try to manage without him. He's usually off to himself in a corner like a pathetic gnome.
Romeo Mitra is the first to break the rules but he's the first to complain about you if he sees anything out of ordinary or if it's something that he doesn't like. He tends to make up his own set of rules and follows them. He even tries to manipulate others and tries to contradict what he's told to do. He has an excuse for eveything and argues back as if he's always right. He likes to have the last word. Always claiming that he is innocent and does nothing wrong. He's the source of every mistake. Los Angeles has enough ignorant humans! We don't need them at the work place! The problem is that these unsophisticated, modern day cavemen need to adapt to the way of life in the U.S. Romeo Mitra's antics do not fool anyone. Don't let his angel face blind you to fall in his trap. That's his only charm and then watch out!
He has a mind of a child with a body of someone who is close to 40 years old. He is saving up money to buy cool rims for his Honda Civic, his dome of pride or is it the dome of his waistline?
I'm the one with balls enough to talk to 'The Man' about the chemical imbalance of Romeo Mitra. The only excuse I get from 'The Man' is that 'changes will be made'. Some changes have been made, but Romeo Mitra is still employed and getting away with murder and laughing about it. I have given 'The Man' proof after proof, nothing has been done. Others have complained about the wrong doings of Romeo Mitra, nothing has been done. I have done everything to my power to get rid of this hemorrhoid of a human but the common remedy doesn't work.

A Romeo Mitra comes in many different shapes and sizes with different walks of life. Management should do an extensive background check on a person before one is hired. All it takes is one bad apple to ruin a good production. One bad person can spread a lot of animosity to other co-workers. If you don't have a team then you can't play the game.

If you're an employee at a job and the real Romeo Mitra comes looking for work. Tell him that you're not accepting applications at this time. If you're a manager, do yourself a favor, to save the quality of your work done by your best people. Do not hire the evils of a Romeo Mitra!


About the Writer

'Mean' Mike Duffau is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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3 comments on A Co-workers Nightmare

Log In To Vote   Score: 5
By Venditto on November 01, 2007 at 01:37 am
wow, I have a Romeo Mitra- his name is Paco and he's worse than any Peurto Rican stereotype you can imagine. You have my sympathies.
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Log In To Vote   Score: 4
By 'Mean' Mike Duffau on December 04, 2007 at 01:53 pm
Thanks man!!! Let me give you the latest... Romeo Mitra has been terminated! 'The Man' has worked in my favor.
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Log In To Vote   Score: 0
By bembem on May 20, 2009 at 02:54 am

a vehicular axxxvnt awaits, 669 will be slow but gruesome... watch every second of the day... you have been cuxxxx... peace be with...u. rest in peace

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