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Friday, October 20, 2017

Mr. Tangerine Says: Presidential Race Silliness

by James Hershiser (writer), Irvine, October 12, 2007

Is it just me, or is the 2008 Presidential Race turning silly? Now, granted, it is early in the race...well, wait a minute, that is one thing that is silly right there: uh, isn't the election in November 2008? We have not even hit November 2007, and the major hype has been going on this race since, what, 2006? When did this start happening? Pretty soon, the next Presidential campaign will start the day after the Presidential election: neat, just what I am looking forward to, 4 years of political punditry and media ads. Someone slap me now...

Now, with the Democrats: we have a bunch of contenders, which apparently has gone down to two front runners, Hilary Rodham Clinton and Barack Obama. Just a few weeks ago, they were comparing the two cadidates' current accumilated fundraising efforts like they were comparing their cars, which would have been something like this: Barack, you have a expensive Mercedes, but Hilary, you have a teeny-little bit MORE expensive Mercedes...Joy! Uh, folks, what is the difference between $27 million for Obama, and $30 million for Hilary? I mean, after you get past a certain point, a million here or there is not going to make much difference, plus the fact that the Democratic Party convention is over 6 months away...I mean, folks, do you think they can't raise any more? All's they have to do is go to Hollywood and hold a $1000 a plate dinner, and they are set, California being the ATM for the Democratic Party...plus, since when has money raised or had dictated who will get elected? Ask Mr. Forbes that one...

Besides the money, there now is Al Gore: he is flirting with being my nominee for the H. Ross Perot Clown Award, given to the candidate who brings comic relief to the various party campaigns. Just because Al won a Nobel Peace Prize, he is now thinking about entering the Presidential Race: gee, if we are using that logic, why not have Jimmy Carter run, too? He can be elected again: He only served one term...he was the last Democratic President who's last name was not Clinton, so why not? Actually, I was disappointed that Al did not run in 2004: that could have been promoted by Don King like a boxing match, "Bush versus Gore 2004: The Rematch!" But now? Please...Al, stay away! Let Hilary and Barack (and maybe John Edwards, too) vie for the nomination...

Which brings us to the Incumbent party, the party you love to hate, yes, my friends, the Republicans: this also was looking to be a two-horse race, between Rudy Guliani and Mitt Romney (who elicits the response from me that Hannah Montana does: Who? ), when all of a sudden, like the start of a Law and Order episode, Fred Thompson shows up. Fred is my candidate for the Republican H. Ross Perot Clown Award: he has dropped in, looked kind of Presidential, said some okay stuff, and all of a sudden he is a front-runner here? What about guys like John McCain, who have actually done some things politically the last few years, other than warming a seat in the Senate for Tennessee, which is Al Gore's home state, by the way (do I smell conspiracy here? This should make the conspiracy nuts go bonkers for a few days, at least)
Boy, doesn't that tell you something about the Republican candidates, as in they are so mediocre, that an actor can come in and all of a sudden be one of the main guys? I see the Republicans are desperate: they are pulling the Ronald Reagan strategy, as in get a actor in, stat! Poor Mr. Lincoln and Mr. Reagan are spinning in their graves, I am sure...

Oh, and what about the issues? What issues? Who knows what these people think about the issues, they change their positions so much, we should give them all the John Kerry Flip-Flopper Award. See how silly this is? And this has JUST BEGUN...it is over a year until the election folks.

That is a long time to have a Silly Season, don't you think?


About the Writer

James Hershiser is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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