Sunday, September 23, 2018

Stunning "Revelations" About Bonds in SF Weekly

by Ed Attanasio (writer), San Frickin' Frisco, Baby!, September 28, 2007


The SF Weekly is featuring a cover story this week entitled, “Steroids Confidential – Greg Anderson Has Given Up His Freedom Rather Than Testify About Barry Bonds. But One Man Has Learned The Trainer’s Secrets,” a piece written by Nic Foit and Ira Tes. When I first read this article, I was absolutely astonished at what it uncovered. And what I learned after reading it shocked me even more.

In the article, they reveal that Barry Bonds injected steroids into his penis in order to satisfy his mistress Kimberly Bell, which later led to Bonds not being able to bend over and caused an error that led to the California Angels beating the Angels in the 2002 World Series. The article also goes on to tell about a titanium brace that had to be implanted into Bonds’ neck in order to keep his huge bobble-like steroid’ed head from flopping over. The article then goes into detail about the supposed fact that now that the MLB is testing for steroids, Bonds consumes a “power drink” that consists mainly of elk semen.

The fact is -- this entire article is a ruse. If you unscramble the authors’ names, you come up with “Fiction and Satire.” What I can’t believe is that there is not one single disclaimer within the entire piece. In one sense – it’s absolutely brilliant. From another point of view, it’s completely irresponsible. If Bonds does not sue the SF Weekly, I will be very surprised.

To read this very creatively written article, check out this link:

About the Writer

Ed Attanasio is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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4 comments on Stunning "Revelations" About Bonds in SF Weekly

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By VeroniqueChevalier on September 29, 2007 at 08:41 pm
The foibles of the human species apparently know no limits...If there really is a Higher Power, he/she/it must be getting a really giggle from all these bizarre and brainless antics in the realms of sports and journalism.
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By Jen on September 29, 2007 at 10:30 pm
Was it written by Billbob Bubba perchance?
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By Steven Lane on September 30, 2007 at 01:38 am
You would have to shoot me before I would inject something in my penis.
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By rjlight on September 30, 2007 at 01:38 pm
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