Thursday, July 19, 2018

From Empty Nest to Love Nest

Our parenting job is done. Our children are all grown and moved out. And that is that!

So what are my husband and I to do now? Now that our once-full and busy “nest” is found empty and we are therefore suddenly free of all family responsibilities? “Children responsibility”; of worrying and providing for, that is! What should now fill the many empty hours and [long] days ahead that were once in-every-respect spoken for—cooking and cleaning for...chauffeuring for...cultivating good manners, and how-to make life choices that will meet their individual needs for their long-term happiness?

We took our vows seriously, “Through sickness and in health!” Children included.

And lest we forget, all the sleepless nights taking care of them through the many icky and messy childhood illnesses that are undoubtedly part of the “Parenthood” package!

So tired were we at the end of each day that we were lucky if we still had energy and desire left for each other. And just because they got “older” it didn’t mean that raising them got any easier. I think the worries were felt more frequent.

We’ve seen them through failures (and talked them through it), a broken heart, loneliness, failed relationships...and we cried along with them, comforting them as best we could.

Of course, there was also the financial-worry end of it, too. Through too many paychecks praying we’d make ends meet at the end of each month; and too many times we were just barely making it to the last available dollar.

But hallelujah when we did! The bills got paid and our children never went hungry!

Did I mention that we no longer have our wedding rings (among other treasures)? Yeap! Many years long gone! My beloved engagement ring and wedding bands were one of the first things to go, sacrifices required to feed our little familia when we fell on very hard times. And we’ve seen many of those days during our thirty-two-years stretch of nesting.

We did our utmost best, as any caring parent would, with whatever humble means we had available, to meet our children’s every basic and immediate needs and reasonable comfort—and surpassing even that when we were able. And let’s not forget we also made darn sure they each received their fair share of Love and Attention—two very important ingredients thrown into the bargain of Nesting—according to their individual needs (for each child requires something different).

Our hope; that when they were ready to go out into the world on their own we’d succeeded in building happy but well-adjusted children—children that would grow into strong and caring and capable, self-sufficient adults,

Today we are proud to see for ourselves and share our report that they have!

Naturally, we will always worry about our grown children, and probably till our last breath on earth.

Our parenting job is done. Our children are all grown and moved out. And that is that!

My husband and I, we firmly believe, have most certainly earned whatever happy moments are allotted to us now, and feel we are deserving of enjoying it to the fullest.

I think we can afford to be a little selfish at this point in time.

We have a new little place, a perfect fit just for two; here we can write a new chapter from our empty nest life. We no longer need to sneak-around when we want to kiss and let our passion loose. Let romance sweep us off our feet! We do not need to be afraid our conversations will be overheard. We will cook and eat what we want without worry that the kids won’t like it! And the added bonus here: we can pack a little or big bag and take off when the mood strikes us, and we’ll be spending our hard-earned money only for two!

For the record let me now say:

Adiós empty nest! Holá love nest!!

Virginia Kahler-Anderson

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HomeRearedChef is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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7 comments on From Empty Nest to Love Nest

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By riginal on July 26, 2014 at 07:35 am

nice post V,i think you've just about summed up sacrifice and the reason for being. :>).

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By Barbara MacDonald on July 26, 2014 at 10:04 am

32 amazing...congrats my friend. I admire that. Yes, now is you and hubby's time to shine....except if they are like mine, it really never is ended as far as children go. They just bring more to us in the form of spouses and amazing grand kids...The circle of life. Yes , you certainly have some very well deserved time and money to spend as you both please...enjoy dear Virginia. I smiled through out reading well expressed , as always . hugs...

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By HomeRearedChef on July 26, 2014 at 02:00 pm

Riginal: So now hubby and I have the time to sit back and enjoy what's left of our life before we lose our teeth and hair. So why do I find myself still missing all that family chaos? We just can't win. Darn if you do and darn if you don't!

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By HomeRearedChef on July 26, 2014 at 02:04 pm

Barbara: I agree, that no matter what, no matter how much time, we are never "ended" where our children are concerned. I still worry about them, and I still want them in my life, as often as possible. :) However now I worry about my grandchildren. And now we know where my beautiful greys are coming from.

(By the way, I love my peppered grey coming in.)

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By Barbara MacDonald on July 26, 2014 at 02:29 pm

Yes Virginia, I own children turned my hair I am waiting on my 9th grand child...actually going to a baby shower tomorrow for my daughter Alicia... and like you, I love having them in my life. I really never am bored . I love your hair looks wonderful on you...although you do not have too much silver yet. I too have not colored mine in around 2 years now, and refuse to..I rather like the silver that is coming in better. Enjoy your weekend dear lady...xoxo

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By melanie jean juneau on July 26, 2014 at 08:34 pm


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By HomeRearedChef on July 26, 2014 at 11:16 pm

Thank you, Melanie!

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