Most of us live in a constant state of self-delusion. To illustrate what I mean, consider this scenario. Suppose two men sit side by side on a hill. One man is aware of himself, sitting on the hill as he looks at a beautiful sunrise. The other man is so enthralled with that very same sunrise that he forgets himself and becomes absorbed in the scene. In the first instance the man is egocentric; he is in delusion because he is at the centre of his world, viewing the scene as if the entire universe revolved around him.
When I see beauty everywhere, I experience joy and a sense of connection because my eyes are not on myself. The truth is that I am simply part of the whole. Everything does not depend on me because I am a piece of a huge, interconnected system not the queen of a tiny universe. This means that I am free to relax and enjoy the beauty of nature when I am in the right place in the scheme of things, when I give up my grand delusion that puts me at the center of the universe.
I am living in a fantastical delusion when I view everything as if I was the center of all reality. I view people, events and history through my eyes, judging what is right, trusting my thoughts and my feelings as the final judge of what is real.
Why is modern man so anxious, nervous, out of sorts?
Part of the reason is probably that many people barely see a blade of grass during their normal work day. Surrounded by concrete and glass, our innate self craves connection with the rest of the natural world and other people .
Instead we live in isolated, self-made prisons which shut out other humans never mind other living creatures and the universe. Each person is at the centre of their little artificial universe. That means that each of us has assumed the role of king or queen of our tiny kingdoms with everything depending on us.
I was never designed to live alone like an island unto myself. Yet, in my pride, I cling tenaciously to my throne and crown. Only when I was completely depleted and shattered, only then did I resign, only then did I surrender an ego centric point of view and embrace reality where I am simply part of the universe.
Definitely absurd but I only saw this fact after I surrendered and let go of control. I cannot find what is really important in life in self-created delusions but I can discover truth as I learn to live in harmony with a bigger universe than the one I create.I continually seek to let go of my delusions of grandeur, to live in reality and in communion, connecting with nature, other people and with God.