REAL STORIES
BY REAL PEOPLE Search
Tuesday, November 21, 2017

Don't just rush in helter skelter. RIGINAL.

by riginal (writer), moe australia, January 11, 2014

Free advice on the unknown blankets one must overcome on your wedding night which some flee from in the morning out of realization that their vows were overtaken a! e! I! O! ouch! by vowel scratching!

WORLD'S SHORTEST MARRIAGE/Divorce. RIGINAL.

"I pronounce you man and wife. Ladies and gentleman and that little nauseating uncontrollable 'ants- in- his- pants' care flee obnoxious little one sticking; or should i say dipping, his little grubby feeler in the onion dip DESIST! The former fleedom fighter,Rev Louse, regained his composure,glared at the dipper just out of diaper. "Pleased to present to you Mr and Mrs Flee."

The onion dip kid spat onion dip over the cake, probably improving the taste as the cake itself was cardboardic to say the least.

The only guest was onion diaper by sheer virtue of the fact he was the remnant of his mother.Her offspring wound up child from a former quick flit disaster was now virtually swimming in the onion dip out of sheer boredom. The Rev revved his 'flee' Harley freely.The resounding bark of the disturbed tampered with unbaffled exhaust raunchified the eats table vibrating the onion stroking kid onto the floor of the dimly flit little chapel in downtown Vegas...just a flea's p from vile Hotel Califleania.

The wedding night spent de-onionising little Flee,his diaperactive discharge and the itching suffered from the badsheet exudationary unwelcome 'guests' ruined any chance of a love in...out, or fly about. There came by daybreak a cry about...everything! "Rev Louse" wailed the Flees it was a lousy idea"a quickie divorce please." Young gun Flee licked the lid of the onion dip lid,threw it in an arc caught it in his bored little lips. "Are you sure folks it's just not a seven year 24 hr itch,have you talked or at least scratched between the sheets? "We have!" was the unisific response. "Get us unmarried...NOW!"

The Rev sighed, poured an anti-flee mixture lousy with spirit into the flee brushed tank. Ordered the Flees to stand-feelings exposed hands over ears- in the direct perfumic path of the rumbling H. Rev revved,blowing the three Flees flat on their backs. The divorce paper was read solemnly and with respect."Mr and Mr Flea i now delouse you as man and wife you may itch the bride and for the God of flea's sake please take that onion sparring cantankerous, onion lid throwing brat with you!"

moral: don't tie the gnat until you check out compatibility, don't exchange onion rings or bad bedsheets without first checking your partner's itch as one or the other may not want to come up to scratch...in 7 years to come will onion breath pale the marriage? Best to get on the web and wed a Harley? "I now pronounce you throttle and bottle...with discretion. Do not under any circumference drink whilst riding or get onion dip on your bobtail exhaust...it stinks!



About the Writer

Bio...bioio...daylight come an i wanna go home. Come missa tele man tele me banana. A banana tele? Seriously would like to hook up with other comedy writers to engage.
Want to write articles too? Sign up & become a writer!

0 comments on Don't just rush in helter skelter. RIGINAL.



Add A Comment!

Click here to signup or login.


Rate This Article


Your vote matters to us



x


x