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United Kingdom Encourages Same Sex Adoption

by Steven Lane (writer), Simi valley, Ca and Austin, Tx., June 21, 2007

gay , sex
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About a month back, a representative of the Slimbridge Wildfowl and Wetlands Trust, in Gloucestershire, England, made a startling announcement. Management there admitted to the press that they had duped two unsuspecting gay pink flamingos into fatherhood.

The couple, Carlos and Fernando, who have been clacking beaks for over six years now, have a history of desperate attempts at fostering chicks. Unable to lay their own potential omelets, the same sex pair has been known to muscle prospective parents, and legitimate egg owners, right off the nest so they could raise the fledgling flamingos by themselves. A WWT spokesman, Nigel Jarrett, said: "They have been known to fight the heterosexual birds and steal their eggs. There is usually a 'handbags-at-10-yards' moment where they scrap with the other couple before stealing the egg."

When a nest, complete with "Huevo de Flamingo", was found deserted and left to the elements, the Wildfowl and Wetlands Trust management team quickly put it's dastardly, deceitful, plan of deception into action. The unhatched egg was rushed to an incubator where it was warmed and scrutinized carefully by staff. Soon after, a healthy chick was hatched. Unknown to the flamboyant flamingos, a decision had been made that forever would change their lives.

WWT spokeswoman, Jane Waghorn said, "They were rather good at sitting on eggs and hatching them, so last week, when a nest was abandoned, it seemed like a good idea to make them surrogate parents." Fearing that simply putting the newborn chick in Carlos and Fernando's nest might be met with disbelief and a lack of "bonding" between the boys and their new charge, a strategy of sneakiness was devised.

While the male flamingo's were vacant from their "nest", (Possibly out strutting their stuff in the "elaborate courtship dance" they performed twice a year.), management repacked the new kid in an old eggshell. Taped together like mom's favorite Norman Rockwell decorator plate, the "package" was slipped into the unsuspecting dynamic duo's abode.

The pair returned and very quickly were seen "talking" to the chick inside the egg. A short time later it popped out of the shell once again, only to be met by it's new surprised and elated foster parents. The deception complete, Mr Jarrett reports, "They are very good parents and behave just as the heterosexual birds do when rearing their young."

Are Pink Flamingos the only animals to have come "out" so publicly? Not so, according to Richard Savill, in his article, "Gay flamingos are both family men." ...."As well as male flamingos that mate, their are male ostriches that only court their own gender. Film-makers recently caught female macaque monkeys engaged in intimate acts. Male penguins have been know to pair up, while ignoring potential female mates."

Seen on a blog on this subject:
"Do they have little plastic people lawn ornaments?"


www.thesun.co.uk
www.telegraph.co.uk "Gay flamingos are both family men", by Richard Savill
www.theregister.co.uk
www.iVillage.com Grrl Genius



About the Writer

Steven Lane is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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8 comments on United Kingdom Encourages Same Sex Adoption

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By Phoenix on June 21, 2007 at 03:32 pm
And, I thought gay animals only existed on the show 'South Park'... Great story!
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By Jen on June 22, 2007 at 12:53 pm
You can find examples "gayness" among just about any species on this planet. There is much we can learn from the other animals here, as this example here proves. Another good one Steven!
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By Charles Harmison on June 23, 2007 at 08:51 pm
This is definitively my fav from you. Love the picture from the great Waters movie. And not even one mention of why its there. Absolutely excellent. Your new personal photo ain't too shabby either BTW.
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By Charles Harmison on June 23, 2007 at 08:53 pm
oh wait thats Mael with the toilet. Sorry bout that
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By Steven Lane on June 23, 2007 at 10:31 pm
I have met Mael, its a striking resemblance, lol
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By Geddy on June 23, 2007 at 11:55 pm
Outing flamingos...have you no shame!
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By VeroniqueChevalier on September 23, 2007 at 04:44 pm
As Seinfeld said, "Not that there's anything wrong with it" and all, but I couldn't help notice, Steve, that you share the same last name as that notoriously gay actor, Nathan. Do you two share any other similarities besides the moniker? (BTW, my alleged grandfather Maurice was rumored to be "une fée" as well, so perhaps that is why I ended up as a homosexual man trapped in a woman's body).
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By Steven Lane on September 23, 2007 at 10:41 pm
As Mongo said in Blazing Saddles..I believe this is right... "Mongo (and myself) straight."
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