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Wednesday, October 18, 2017

Rainbows of Your Life for which You Lived and Died

by Uttam Gill (writer), BOMBAY(MUMBAI), September 30, 2013

It is about introspection of oneself, life and the given scenario under which we all live...

When somebody goes unannounced leaving no mark…The reasons thereafter when emerges in your mind, perhaps no one would ever wish to have…As now it has come I suddenly see nothing…nothing beyond. No sound gain perfection to make way inside. I am in state of absolute silence, feeling the audacious and droned display of my own circumvention…My trial by me only and once again I am on to the same old platform where I ask myself; “damn it…you once again got into this… ”How could I explain to myself…I yell… ”Damn it you man…what you think of yourself… someone out of world, a great trendsetter…you stupid fellow, you would never realize that the how weird you are…the way you act, the way you assume…you know, what’s that, that’s your make believe world…don’t you dare, sell your rotten dreams and hope…not even knowing that you are hopeless creature. Do you understand …you don’t have any clue that, how unpractical you are…you are just like one more stupid dreamer, sitting on the road side drawing attention of the passerby for them to listen to you…Let me talk to you… you know what’s the problem with you…you are creating yourself as some sort of preacher…come on stop preaching…go away take your sickening belief and never ever try to create a world which cannot be possible…I know now you would hang your face…now listen…you better understand and pull up your socks… stop being stupid…you are mad…down to the bone you are neurotically obsessed with your hope…I can see your shoulders drooping now and eyes moistened…listen you fool don’t waste your tears…you know where are you…you are in the wilderness…In your make believe world. You are so perfect in assuming…hats off to you…you thick headed man don’t you know that you have been consistently failing…let this sink into you that you are just an ordinary man and not a crusader…and better don’t assume that you can create the world which you believe in. Hold your nerves…calm down…Take a deep breath…Now listen carefully…Look you have been through bad times and just don’t think you are the only one, in this world many like you selling dreams…but no buyers for that… and even if someone buy would purely doing as pittance. Am I making it very clear…you see many a time we get carried away that world will sing for us…I am afraid it never…Don’t play by your rule, world has its own rule…on to the unbeaten path even if you wish to tread you would get a severe beating…I know right now you must be cursing yourself and fuming too…but would it make the difference…It’s high time in life you must understand that you have not structured your belief in line with as it is suppose to be…Don’t be timid…your timidity has cost you…now is the time to shed your dreams…stop selling your dreams…Scratch yourself bit deeper and you would see the reality…Don’t feel uncomfortable…I know it would be difficult initially because your silly mind is sedated…you are in captivity of romanticism…Oh! These words sound good but do you know the mortality rate… unrecognized you die …even if the mourner comes…they say let the poor man soul rest in peace…would you like to listen to such heart piercing words…why don’t you think normally…listen my dear, don’t create anarchy, don’t peel off your own skin…why don’t you see that self inflicted wounds are testimony to the facts that you are reckless… you are still turning away from the reality…and you are bleeding profusely…You will die…save yourself…accept the verdict and live by the facts that your dreams are undesirable. I warn that if you don’t adhere to my words you would continue to bleed…Even if you wish to continue like this…I just pray for you…My last words I know what I asked, must have insulted you…but my purpose was not that…I hope you understand I never mean any offence to you…my only intention is to ensure that you live peacefully…How can I remain quite when I see people hurt you as if you have done a great sin…your innocent dreams you are trying to sell and people laughing at you or creating a devil out of you…they are deriving pleasure and in glory defining your purpose as demeaning…just stop it…go away …just don’t sell your dreams…don’t fall prey to them when they ask for rainbow…don’t go running to them…they will sting…Don’t let anybody comes to you…insulate yourself…Forget about that you live…you live for the dead world…you exist without your dream so that you live…don’t give hope and just hope that you live without hope…live as others live… just be there… world would hold you and you will live as their man…They would dance to see you that you are towing their lines…They have clipped your wings and given you the boots…wear it and march in order to their tune as world ask for…Forget about songs, dance and the joyful modes of life…You are born as worldly man…so behave as one…I think I have made it amply clear now if you wish to be like this then I won’t stop you… but I won’t stop talking to you… I live in you…your pains are mine…I will keep questioning you…I know your dreams…I know your purpose…even if I know the reality in contrary I cannot leave you…Carry on just as millions are doing and many millions have left this world unsung…just carry on…you are not a stranger to me…you are me… my own…I lived your dreams…I have seen your dreams dying too…just as you are timid ...I would also remain timid to question you, to calm you, to caution you…If you are bent upon doing your own way I wish to see you succeed…even if you fail it won’t affect me because I am so use to your failure so much…but I would surely raise my eyebrows…I know you bloody hard nut you won’t crack but I am seeing the cracks emerging…you may not own up and just see my lunacy knowing the inevitable I am living within you…When you are going to die I wish to see smile on your face…then I would definitely cry because all rainbows which you tried to give to others would be there on your face…RAINBOWS OF YOUR LIFE FOR WHICH YOU LIVED AND DIED



About the Writer

Uttam Gill is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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3 comments on Rainbows of Your Life for which You Lived and Died

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By Barbara MacDonald on October 01, 2013 at 08:28 am

I remember this Uttam, and it still touches my heart..life at times is so perplexing that we all scartch our heads asking many questions...my best wishes are always with you. Introspection is an important part of who we are...we often learn so much this way, (even at times when we do not like what we learn)...but in this learning we grow into a higher purpose...very well expressed , as always.

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By Barbara MacDonald on October 01, 2013 at 08:30 am

*scratch ...

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By Milcia88 on July 26, 2014 at 04:39 am

That is so awesome fensterbau

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