Sunday, July 22, 2018

Girls, Girls, Girls, And More Girls

by Scorpion Sting (writer), Houston, TX, April 29, 2013

A little tale about the bachelor, his party, lots of alcohol, and of course many more girls than anyone can imagine.

In a few ways I really miss being a bartender. In a few ways I even miss being a bartender in a full nude strip bar. The environment in a strip bar is very different than working in a regular bar or even in a restaurant. Y'all might be thinking that the only real difference would be the scenery. In many ways y'all would be right assuming that. However, as a person that has worked at a multitude of bars in a variety of settings, I can personally say that the strip bar is totally a different world. Most things can be considered a bit upside down, a bit strange, and definitely very loud. I enjoy going out places that provide bar services because I enjoy watching people. There is no better place to watch people than in a bar. Well, unless you consider a busy mall, say a few days before Christmas, which is just plain insanity if you want to know what I actually think. I think the best thing about the strip bar is that every night of the week is a party from open until close and then the party generally doesn't end. Can y'all tell I have spent way too much time behind the bar at strip clubs? This weekend was no different. Against my will I was asked to arrange a bachelor party since it was known I had some kind of connections on the inside at a very large, very prominent full nude strip bar. When I asked what the budget was, I was told that money was not an option. I believe it, I know the people involved. My friend, Mike, who I have known for about fifteen years, has a great job. The young man that is getting married soon is 25 and works with Mike. So, this falls into it's a party for a friend of a friend. I don't know him or his future wife so I don't know what he likes. I was told that whatever I could pull off that the friend, Daniel, would like, enjoy, and he would be totally surprised. I made a few phone calls. Then, I made a few more phone calls. I made some special arrangements. Then the deal was set, the party was a go. The guest list had 56 people on it. From my understanding, some of Daniel's family was a part of it all.

This past Saturday was the big day for Daniel and all of his friends and family. Little did I know in the beginning that this entire operation was going to cost me personally. In order to pull this off I am required to be the bartender for the open-bar (pre-paid at $6,000.00) being provided for the bachelor party. All the dancers who are to provide personal entertainment to the party were also pre-paid $7,500.00 which will be split between 10 of them who will be 100% dedicated to the party only for 4 hours. I knew in advance that other dancers will be available as part of their rounds who will be dancing solely for tips. Which is the boat I am in, I am doing it for tips alone as well. The last deposit made was to the club to cover whatever at $1,500.00 which is non-refundable. If you have been following, they dropped $15,000.00 to make this party happen. And, that is only the beginning of the money to be spent. Mike provided limo service for the bachelor and a select number of other people who were at the pre-party party. I arrived around 3 hours early to get set up. I was provided one barkeep to help me out so it wasn't too bad. Daniel did not know the destination of the limo and nobody was allowed to say anything. So when the limo arrived Daniel was a little surprised. Now, I know why he is surprised because I was already told, Daniel is a virgin. Daniel was greeted at the limo by two angels dressed in very sheer white lingerie. He was then paraded throughout the entire club in a procession of dancers. Meanwhile, the rest of the party was seated and orientated to the club, it's features, and the staff that would be in charge of their every desire. I have seen more than a few of these parties but this one would definitely be one of the top two. Close to the end of the parade Daniel is led up to the main stage and introduced to the entire club. Every dancer in the club introduced herself to Daniel on stage in one way or another. I think he was actually enjoying himself and the party hasn't even begun to get going yet. Finally he is walked over to a giant red and black velvet covered throne which sits around two feet higher than the rest of the chairs. He was assigned his personal assistant by the applause of the crowd. This dancer is to help Daniel have a good time and assure that whatever he needs is delivered promptly. Now he has the look of disbelief on his face, you know the one, where someone was caught off guard and presented the winning lottery check for 10 million dollars and the keys to his new mansion, yea, that look.

The evening progressed nicely and everything was going pretty smooth. I was up to my old tricks at the bar doing drinking dares with dancers, serving shots on and in the strippers, and of course made some of the best flaming drinks I think I have ever done. How could I have ever grown tired of all this? The party exceeded their pre-paid open bar by right at $4,000.00 and that didn't stop them from any drinking once so ever. Scuttle butt has it that the 10 assigned dancers made well over $5,000.00 in tips and the roaming dancers made between $500.00 and $1,500.00 a piece, it just depended on how much time they spent dancing for the party. How much did I make in tips? Well, I worked for 5 hours for the party and made just shy of $4,200.00 while doing it. So, it was well worth my time I think. I am sore tho, my shoulder is killing me, and I have an hour drive to get home. I watched as the party broke up, many of them stayed, moving out into the general population of the club and continuing to keep the party going. However, when it was over, I did notice that Daniel and a few family members did leave the club. I only hung out long enough to get things cleaned up and talk to a few friends I haven't seen in some time now. I was actually surprised at how many strippers I actually recognized since this isn't usually a profession where longevity is something seen to often. I have mentioned that before I think, how the doors to a strip club are revolving, people in and people out on a very regular basis. Of course, the owner, my old boss, asked if I wanted my job back for the 100th time since I quit in just over 8 months. I declined. It's fun for the money on occasion, but I like only doing it on occasion. Funny thing was that I was home by midnight, my wife was up still because she was reading a really good book. We talked for a bit, she asked how much I made, so I told her. She said she will enjoy her half, I laughed, she just held her hand open. She told me to use the money I have left and get a head start on my new truck. She said she knew that was the only reason I went to do this gig was to get some started cash to begin work on the new truck project. Actually, I never thought of that, I was thinking this would pay for my surgery on my shoulder nicely and make it were I could be off work for a few weeks unpaid. Well, it was my intention.

So, I got the call this morning from Mike. He said that this was the best bachelor party he has ever been to and he knows who to call the next time. Thanks, Mike. Maybe this would be a good time to change my number! I also was called by Daniel who invited me and my wife out to dinner with him and his future wife when they get back from their honeymoon. I can't figure out why, but what the hell, right. I have had goofier things happen to me in my life. I called my wife and she said that the party had to have been pretty damn good if both of those called. What can I say, my friends know how to throw a party.

About the Writer

Scorpion Sting is a writer for BrooWaha. For more information, visit the writer's website.
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