Quite a good majority of urban educated women says marriage is a a hinderance to their freedom and progression. Women are born free, but still their freedom is shackled under the guise of marriage, through out their life. Eventhough the shackles of marriage were broken by the hard-core feminists long ago, it is only today majority women around the world are realizing the importance of physical freedom to them unrestrained by the institution of marriage. Today they either prefers to be single or to have only live in relationships with a view not to loose their natural freedom. Increasing education and good employment opportunities are infusing confidence among the educated women that they are no more dependents on men. They firmly believe that marriage thoroughly hinders their physical movements and restricts their freedom of thought and do not want to mortguage their unrestrained freedom of movements for the institution of marriage.
Even in traditional societies like India, now a days educated young women prefer dating, live in relations, or temporary physical relations for amusement, instead of being capitive in life long marriage. This is apparent if you see the ‘dating’ and ‘singles’ portals, where millions of employed urban educated women seeking relationships with men for temporary economic support or physical satisfaction. Dating and friendship are preferred over marriage, by majority such young employed women as traditional domination of men in the guise of husbands, over the women, is no more tolerated issue now a days.. The matrimonial, dating, friendship sites in India show the number of Divorcees or separated or 35+ unmarried women keeping their profiles, but they remain unmarried even after they crossed 40+ years, because, their preferences, tastes are not liked by majority men as still 90% of Indian men seek that their life-partner must be like a traditional obeying wife to the husband, inspite of her good education and employment.
Indeed, candidly speaking women lose their freedom as many husbands often looks their wives with suspicion, if they freely talks or interacts with any other man, in his presence or in his absence. This ‘suspicion’ is the very fundamental issue where women think that they lost their freedom with the marriage and being trampled by husbands. Her mind gets grilled between respecting the traditional role as a typical wife and her values, and accepting modern thinking based on equal rights, freedom of thought and movements unrestrained by any force. In this chaos, majority educated women preferring the ‘freedom’ over the ‘marriage’.
But still the hypocratic human socities are imposing the system of marriage on the women of which women are unable to come out legitimately. Any physical relationship if women established with a man, beyond marital purview, is being considered by human society and law, as illigitamate relation and on par with prostitution. This is the greatest obstacle that is forcing the women into the institution of marriage. If chance gets several married men often enter into physical contacts with other women out of lust or for physical amusement. But, if a married women enters into physical contact with another man, she will be called as ‘characterless’ and a ‘debachee’ and she will be given up by the husband. That hypocratic and discriminatory image what the modern women want to avoid by avoiding the very marriage itself. Without entering into the matrimonial relationship, if a woman does have any number of secret contacts she can not be questioned in general by anyone, and her freedom of life remains intact. That freedom, infact women wanted even after the marriage, but the society is not accepting this and calling it as illegitimate. So, even today the women’s struggle for absolute freedom is going on.
Her mind and movements are being controlled in the guise of institution of marriage for which the ‘husband’ is the Ruler and wife is ruled. Now the rebellion is “why should we be ruled by the husbands”? “If we enter into the marriage we will be ruled, if we do not enter into the marriage we can not be ruled by men and our freedom remains untouched” this is the changed trend in women attitude, which is not digestible to men. Even if laws relating to equal rights, freedom etc., are enacted for physical control of the bodies, human mind and thoughts can not be controlled by the law and legal bodies. That freedom unrestrained by law or other humanly controls are being desired by the women. Therefore for majority sections of educated women institution of marriage has become outdated. They need something new institution.
Will Plato’s communism of wives works out for modern women? Surveys and debates have to be conducted by bigwigs on this topic, to minimize the psychological sufferings of women and to increase their freedom. By dchaitanya