Why is that we don’t own up when we see our dreams shattered? Why don’t we accept the fate? Why we deliberately create a shield saying touch me not? Why is that we just drag ourselves, knowing well, that life is too short? Why that the questions like this would unsettle anyone? And why is that the answers looses its relevance? When I think over this, I find no valid reason to answer the dilemmatic questions of my life. I know it’s not that easy and I also know that, I have been so brutally questioned about my propriety, as if somebody is going to display the trophy, saying, that “I have cut him to size”…Don’t you ever think, why they do so? Again a difficult question…I know why it is difficult…it’s all in your head; the baggage of bitter experience. You don’t want to shed tears because you have the courage to defy your pain; unknowingly you have become exhibitionist. You are real and the reality is while exhibiting the reality you loose yourself and in the bargain you acquire a stature of so called very seasoned man in utopian term. If this seasonality brings laurel to anyone then surely I would like to yell over such dastardly observations.
The seasoned man unknowingly become an exhibitionist not knowing, that this won’t fetch him the real happiness…his steal resolve is applauded because people wish to see him as they perceive but not as the shredded victim of conspiring belief of the world. You may say to hell with this man…I pounce back to say to hell with you…hellish are your belief…hellish are your action…hellishly you have caused doom…your pretensions are apocalyptically inclined towards darkness not willing to see the light…Hell is where the darkness is…Am I exhibiting an enlightenment…No… no, see my starvation for light… We are piling our ignorance and in semantic state refuse to budge and so therefore refuse to see the light too.
How stupid we are…we are failing and still claiming our success over the mindless bloody conflicts, over the disgusting rituals, customs and sickening beliefs…I am aghast to see this erosion…but who cares…a loner is a loner…still I wish to be not what many wish to see me as…my melancholic aspirations surely would be defined as out of box thinking but rest assured, I won’t feast over others miseries, as in myopic sense people wish to read.
The shrieking punctuated time of our dark hours failed to hold the reason to go for light but we preferred to stay in the dark. The lethal concoction of utopian world has kept everybody sedated and I refuse to be sedated further. My timidity is now acquiring an arrogance because my dwarfing image mocking the giants…How dare I can be different…you know they won’t slap me…they won’t kick me…they simply would declare me eccentric first…If I acquire more space… to contain me... they would declare me lunatic…matter is over …it is resolved…the redundant soul is defined in stages and ultimately I fail to exist as normal…I am declared lunatic. Lunatic is not alone…LUNATIC HAVING HIS LUNA TO SMILE WITH… He is seeing the light