The Chicago Bears who have obtained most of their quarterbacks from the loading docks at UPS or college football powerhouse Vanderbilt are rumored to be so desperate for a quarterback, they are considering pulling Brett Favre’s butt out of a Bass boat in Mississippi and un-retiring for the umpteenth time, the aging wonder.
Two weeks ago, the Bears number one quarterback Jay Cutler was injured attempting to stop a San Diego touchdown reception which unfortunately he had thrown. Given Jay’s performance over the last few years, replacing Cutler should have been a relatively simple thing to do but the same guys who traded for Cutler had thoughtfully picked up his backup: some guy named Caleb. Cutler’s injury had many in the Bears front office scrambling for tee times and hotel reservations in January as playoff hopes dimmed. Then someone remembered Brett Favre was “available” and at about this same time, Donovan McNabb, another aging Viking cast off was released creating the very first NFL quarterback controversy involving a team that had no quarterback… except for Caleb.
Analysts at ESPN which is as generous as anyone should ever be to Michael Wilbon, claim that Favre isn’t a shoe-in for the job. Several sources in the Bear’s Organization and apparently Favre’s wife would prefer the job be given to Donovan McNabb who is actually in Chicago and doesn’t have a handicapped parking sticker on his car…. yet.
In a related story, AARP announced that if Favre does come out of retirement, they would have no recourse but to rescind his membership.
Green Bay Fans were absolutely ecstatic about Favre’s return to the NFL as the Bear’s quarterback. Pointing out that using “Favre” and the word “new” in the same sentence wouldn’t be proper, one Green Bay fan stated, “We waited years for Favre to do something positive to help Green Bay beat the Bears and this could be it”.
Supporters of Favre point out that Brett has already completed 17 passes to Bears receivers and while technically these receptions are listed as interceptions, six did go for touchdowns.
Concerned about off-field distractions that have hampered Favre in the past, a Bears fan remarked, “Hopefully Brett learned his lesson about texting photos he would rather not see on a Christmas Card and can concentrate on football”.