DO YOUR NUTS CRACK IT? riginal.
Did my weekly shopping today. I purchased a pair of coconuts. Actually I picked up a pair of pears first but the coconuts won me over.They looked sad. Lost and hairy.
Now before you say "boring" let me finish. I was drawn to my new nuts. They were male and female, young. How can you tell the difference? The female's eyes are closer together.She was looking at me with those beady imploring eyes that little children use after they crack open a packet of lollies which haven't been paid for, knowing full well mum will pay for the remainder. Or, look... Read More
SELECT A TRAVEL PARTNER. RIGINAL.
My name is John Smith. I'm an investigator of holiday sham. Make yourself at home while i pull a sad sham from my portfolio.
I was resting after wrestling my pet alligator. The phone rang. Big Al released his grip on my powerful torso, spat my mobile out, picked up.
"Al here, been wrestling with John i'll put you on." I stuck my head in Al's jaw,the voice sounded familiar...it was Al.
I pushed Al back in his cage. I told Al to sit. Handed him a Penthouse alligator centrefold. A swamp biscuit and his glasses. Al whistled, dribbled.... Read More
I recently watched one of the new episodes of Glee where they feature Billy Joel (See YouTube video). The cast have just sung Honesty and it has touched a nerve.I have been thinking about the importance of honesty just recently. We all fall into the habit of sacrificing ourselves to the people we love rather than being open and honest and telling people what we want or what we think. As a result we find that life runs away and we end up doing things we don't like or being in situations we don't want to be in. Or perhaps just ending up being someone we don't want to be.
There is a... Read More
HAPPY CHRIS MESS. RIGINAL.
"Dear Sanner, mummy and daddy told me to my greedy little overstuffed face the other night (that's why with a mouth full of lollies i say "Sanna") that because i had been naughty you plump lovely little false- bearded man YOU would not be coming around this year but you and i know different (wink! wink!) now don't we?
See i wouldn't go to bed or pick daddy's Merc up after playing with it. But hear me out oh jolly festive HO HO HO one. I relented and picked the Merc up with dad's front- end- loader. Mummy ran down the drive screaming "put daddy's Merc... Read More
He number of people in the U.S. who are remarrying has dropped by 40% over the past 20 years. In 1990, 50 out of every 1,000 Americans who were divorced or widowed chose to remarry. In 2011, that number dropped to only 29 for every 1,000. Meanwhile, the number of couples who are living together without marriage has risen significantly since the 90s. In 1996, there were 2.9 million unmarried couples living together. In 2012, there were 7.8 million.
It has become a lot more acceptable these days to simply live together—you get all of the benefits of married life, but without the... Read More
When you’ve been in a relationship with the same person for a long time, it can sometimes start to feel like it’s fizzling out. That’s not to say that the relationship has gone completely sour—it’s just not as exciting as it may have been in the beginning when everything was new and electrifying. This is especially the case with a lot of May-December relationships; they start out hot and steamy and then calm down once you’re both more comfortable with each other.
Sometimes, you just need to find a way to spice up your May-December relationship. Gifts are a good way to make your... Read More
Compliments, us women love them. I wonder if our men folk love them equally?
What does the lady in your life want to hear? I am trying to list 'genuine' compliments/words not the 'I want to get you in the sack corn'. A light-hearted and serious look at things we sometimes say to one another.
Genuine from our men-folk
You look stunning. Hairdresser did an amazing job hun. How pretty are you looking right now. I so wish you would believe me when I tell you that you have a great figure. You are the greatest mum. Being with you would have to be one of the smartest things I... Read More
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just be perfect to yourself...be what you are and you will make a date...
Mary Mary quite contrary how does your 'essay garden' grow? With silver bells and cocked up dwells? Dwell on someone else's posts girl. Be a "whoa man,"stop flogging, but then you guys won't stop...so bring it on and we'll all be merry Mary. :>)
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